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lyrics

Verse 1:


Picture me with this horrible feeling I can't explain / Resist it with my reason but the feeling still remains / unease becomes discomfort & discomfort turns to pain / And all the hopes the pain would vanish disappear like David Blane / I hate doctors, hospital gowns, hospital walls / Hate my fingers for dialing, hated that hospital call / Hate I made an appointment, hate I even have to go at all / The reason for the pain's unknown, so know I hate that most of all / And most of all the days were spent waiting for the one / Day I'd finally get this over with the day I'd get it done / Wake up on that morning my stomach is in a windsor knot / Wrestle with this worry while wondering weather it wins or not / Window locks pop down and the belts click / Shift reverse but this is no ordinary trip / She's makin conversation but my loud thoughts drown her out / Uncharted destination so uncertainty surrounds me now

Hook:


Hard for me to picture it, Don't know whats gon happen
Anxiety is real worse than you can imagine
Trapped in this cage, I just miss the old me
Miss the way it used to be back when I was worry free

Verse 2:


Automatic doors open and I'm greeted by that stale air / Pale stare of people waiting wishing they weren't still there / I sit to join them that's when I hear my name called / Stand up, deep breath, exhale, then it's down the hall / Marching through a sea of dread the hallway getting longer / With every dreaded step the looming darkness getting stronger / The chill of that room is a chill you've never known before / owned before never have you been chilled to the bone before / And now it's test after test soon they're testing / My patience as I wonder do they know or are the guessing / CAT scans, MRI's, blood work, x-rays / They wana know for certain so they moving to the next phase / Left waiting anticipating the outcome / My thoughts are catching up & I ain't got the legs to outrun / Play 'em diplomatic like its something I can talk through / Just then the doors open & the specialist walks through / With a somber face he tells me that it's positive / It's in the later stages we can't figure out what's causing it / Stopping it is tough, well known it's just the opposite / Extremely rare type most treatment it won't respond to it / Felt the wrath of Mujliner, you could say I felt the mallet hit / Next words that he spoke were the only care is palliative / Im on the ropes now and then he's going for the sucker punch / Said half the people with this type he wouldn't see in seven months

Hook:


It's hard for me to picture it, don't know how it happened
My nightmare is real worse than you can imagine
Fear is my prison I just want to be free
Emancipated to the old me, I miss the way it used to be


Verse 3:


Suspended in a state of shock searching for my next breath / Rocked by the shockwaves until I have no breath left / Heart sinks into my stomach, stomach plumits to the ground / Where it's found, hit every floor on the way down / And the sound it made caused the greatest avalanche / Of distress & fear it's clear I'll never have a chance / Hard to say what's worse, knowing nothing you can do / Or waiting for the avalanche as it slowly comes to you / Eyes can't hold back, this dam's about to break / There's no use in stacking levy's there's no cover you can take / My tear blurred vision sees devastation surround me / Through flashes of my life crumbling, crashing down around me / The greatest disbelief this doesn't run in my family / No advice for the grief, no instructions on the handling / the feelings of isolation, feeling like I can't deal / Feeling Like I want to wake up, feeling like it can't be real

Hook:


It's hard for me to picture it, don't know how it happened
My nightmare is real worse than you can imagine
Fear is my prison I just want to be free
Emancipated to the old me, I miss the way it used to be

credits

from Beautiful Not Broken [Deluxe Edition], released May 13, 2014

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gospel lee Tulsa, Oklahoma

The Most Perfect Picture Of Imperfection.

Quality Hip-Hop For Imperfect People.

Bringing Light To Dark Places.

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